Trail of Dead Deny Reports of Imminent Australian Tour

australiaSYDNEY, Australia (AP) — Well-traveled musical castaways …And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead have categorically denied rumors they are planning a major tour down under in support of their newest release “The Century of Self”, insisting they have no desire to tour Australia in the future.

Reports had surfaced suggesting the band were in advanced negotiations with major Australian promoters for a nationwide tour this May, but Trail of Dead spokesman Colin Wilson, working for Richter Scale Records in Sydney, moved quickly to quash the unsubstantiated rumors.  “Any reports of confirmed shows in Australia are fictitious.  This is tabloid journalism at its worst.  Trail of Dead have absolutely no intention of touring the southern hemisphere any time soon.”  While retaining a relatively large fanbase within the country, Trail of Dead haven’t set foot on Australian soil since playing the Livid Festival series in late 2002.  Wilson admitted financial concerns, not band enthusiasm, were the driving force behind the decision to stay away.  “Touring Australia is expensive.  Flying in band members along with all the equipment and support staff makes the tour financially unworkable.  They’d have to tour the country for six months just to cover the travel expenses.”

Wilson alleged he knew how the rumors got started.  “We’re not stupid,” he declared.  “Inconsolable fans in Australia, ignored for years and remarkably desperate for contact with the band, pretend to book dates and run to the press hoping to stir up public support for a long, arduous tour by falsely announcing shows which won’t be taking place.  They advertise the plans with fleeting hope the band will see the outpouring of interest and go soft, booking an expensive and totally impractical string of shows, playing in front of a dozen people at each stop.  It’s cute in an Alice in Wonderland meets Crocodile Dundee III sort of way, but I guarantee it’ll never happen.”

Asked when Australian fans could next expect to see Trail of Dead live and in person, Wilson responded unsympathetically.  “As soon as they move off this island and into the real world.”

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